Nature isn’t bad or good. Nature is a relationship, a big map of interconnectedness, of needs met, bodies transformed.
Erin Sharkey, A Darker Wilderness: Black Nature Writing from Soil to Stars
Over the course of this project, Gardening with Gratitude: A Summer on John’s Island, I have formed and strengthened a wide variety of relationships. My relationship with nature, specifically with John’s Island, has been significantly changed due to my sit spot practice and mindfulness while living and working on this island. I encountered stunning moments of beauty, witnessing owls, hummingbirds, frogs, deer, and so much more as I moved mindfully across this land. I slowed down amidst the rush of a hectic job and allowed myself the space to bask in the beauty around me, documenting these moments in the form of reflective journal entries and lists of favorite moments I had with nature. To accompany my sit spot practice, I savored the words of David Haskell in his book, The Forest Unseen: A Year’s Watch in Nature, annotating and reflecting on impactful sections as I reflected on my favorite encounters from my time on John’s.
My relationship with the people around me has changed as well. Through my position as gardener, I had the opportunity to step into leadership and mentorship with children and peers, crafting activities for different age groups and facilitating these activities with a wide variety of children. I reflected on each activity, recognizing what worked and didn’t work and allowing myself grace when a day didn’t go according to plan. I stepped up as a leader within the unit I lived in, advocating for quieter camper voices and offering support as my coworkers came alive in their own place of leadership. I felt proud, I felt ashamed, I learned a great deal about how to work with others and how to lead in a garden setting.
My relationship with the camp garden blossomed like the plants within that fence. I stepped into the role of caretaker, taking on garden chores and maintenance as the summer season went on. It was hard to find the time to get everything done amidst the fast-paced speed of this hectic job, which meant I fell short in many ways as gardener. But in a lot of ways, I also feel very prideful of what I accomplished, of the connection created between campers and earth and of the harvests I was able to facilitate. I’ve facilitated the growth and harvest of lettuce, cucumbers, zucchini, tomatoes, potatoes, snap peas, kale, plums, cherries, cabbage, squash, and rhubarb. I had the joy of hearing children’s reactions to eating something they harvested right out of the ground. With the amount of time I was given to care for this space, I believe I did an impressive job. I was also very proud of myself for advocating for this garden space, voicing things that should’ve been handled differently and standing up for myself and for future gardeners. It was hard being the only staff member working in the garden, sometimes it felt like I didn’t have enough support or like my work wasn’t being respected or appreciated in the way that other departments were. I’m proud of myself for standing up and standing strong in my beliefs.
Finally, my relationship with myself. Many realizations about self have come out of this project and job; I found a great many of my needs being met, and a great many more not being met at all. I learned about how I relate to time, that a face-paced job and lifestyle is doable but not enjoyable or sustainable for me in the longterm. I learned about setting boundaries, voicing that my breaks and time off were for me, that I couldn’t spend those precious moments of rest around other people. My body was transformed, and a lot of it was due to my time in the garden and my time practicing sit spot. I am forever grateful for the opportunity to live, learn, and grow in such a beautiful space, a space that has held a special spot in my heart for a very long time.
